woke up at 630pm, feeling terrible. my room is really like a steamer and i sweat like hell.

i have one paper tomorrow and two on tuesday but i am not very motivated to work on them, tooooooo hot.

i cooked myself instand noodles and got a coke from vending machine and decided to watch "miss singapore universe 2007".

well, i have to say that it is really crap.

if those contestants are there on the stage because they are among the most beautiful local gals in singapore, omg then singaproe is doomed.

i am not sure if it is because most of the sponsers of this event are of body products such as bra companies and spas, the competition seems to focus way more on good bodies than on faces. well, the good point is the gals have good bodies, at least (thank god), but is it justified to let the faces be complete ingnored?

the competition is still on but i am going to mug my paper for tomorrow now. i sincerely hope that the crown will not go to one of the gals who are smiling like crying.

 

yes im crying loud im being childish unreasonable inmature silly stupid im being a real gal the one in movie that i hate the most i woke up early i didnt have lunch i drank two cokes and im going to have one more im going to eat instant noodles im smearing my makeup and throwing away my new dress im such a hopeless idiot im nothing nothing nothing im nobody im just myself 

carrie had a fight with big. they decided not to talk to each other like all other couples did after a fight. eventually big called, many times. carrie didnt pick up the phone every time. a week later, one night, someone knocked at carrie's door. open. it was big. he relieved when he saw carrie: thank god u r still alive! and he turned away. carrie smiled.

it is a very short scene from "sex and the city".

i have never been in favor of big, but he is cute this time.

he is always proud, self-centred, but this time, he is just a pathetic guy who really cares about his galfriend and thinks too much.

people tend to think too much, like me, like my parents, like my friends, like everybody, especially when it comes to someone they care. why didnt pick up the phone? why didnt reply my emails? why never contact me? why nothing? why? why? why? is there anything wrong? is there...?

last year, i missed a routine call home because i went to HK for a weekend without telling my parents. i thought it would be fine if i call them one day late. the truth is, it was not fine. they are think-too-much people. they thought of every situation that i might encounter, including being extremely sick, lost, kidnapped, killed..so when i called the next day on my dad's handphone, he was shouting at the other side of the phone scolding me like hell. but i knew the words underlying -- thank god u r still alive!

people never think too much. i experienced the same thing last week so now i can tell. it is a process, built in every human brain. its programme goes like this: expecting, waiting, thinking, thinking more, panicking, questioning, thinking more, panicking more, thinking too much, going mad...... and finally, " thank god u r still alive"...

 

yes, dear, thank god u r still alive!